


I Chose You

by syriala



Series: Marvel Prompt Collection [92]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-06
Updated: 2017-05-06
Packaged: 2018-10-28 17:11:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10835682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syriala/pseuds/syriala
Summary: Written for this prompt on Tumblr: “i don’t think i can do this anymore”? Sam/Steve please?





	I Chose You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [arwenxs](https://archiveofourown.org/users/arwenxs/gifts).



“I don’t think I can do this anymore,” Sam said when Steve entered their room.

Steve looked bad already, run down, and there was a permanent frown on his face, but Sam looked even worse and he knew it.

He was beyond tired, which was evident in the bags under his bloodshot eyes, and he barely felt alive anymore; too weak to even accompany Steve on most of his searches.

“What?” Steve asked him, eyes wide and hand still on the doorknob.

“I can’t. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t help you, I can’t go on, and I certainly can’t watch you run yourself into the ground, chasing after your former lover,” Sam said and Steve lost even more colour.

“Sam,” he started but then he stopped, obviously thinking something over.

Sam waited patiently, but his decision was already set. He loved Steve, he did, but he couldn’t continue like this. He was running himself ragged and he wouldn’t go on like this. The way they were running after Barnes was too much for him to handle and the knowledge that Steve was running after his maybe ex just hurt him further.

He was pretty sure Steve liked him well enough, but he was also pretty sure that if Bucky let them catch up, Steve would maybe not forget about Sam, but he would certainly not want to be with Sam anymore. And Sam wasn’t about that. He knew he deserved better and he reached the point where he was ready to demand what he deserved.

“I know I haven’t been a good boyfriend lately,” Steve started and Sam stopped him right there.

“You haven’t been a good friend either,” he said and Steve flinched under his words.

“Look,” Sam tiredly sighed. “I know that Barnes is important to you, and I don’t begrudge you that, but I just don’t see a place for me there. I am no super soldier, and this pace is running me down, not to mention that we are chasing your ex, which makes me think that he won’t be your ex for much longer after we find him, and I deserve better, Steve.”

“You do, god, Sam, you do, which is why I decided that we won’t go on anymore.”

“What?” Sam asked, disbelieve in his voice. He hadn’t counted on the fact that Steve would understand and encourage this decision. Secretly he had hoped that Steve would stay for him, but he guessed that was stupid.

Steve’s and Bucky’s love story spanned centuries, there was no way he could compare to that, and Sam realized that he had been foolish to hope. It didn’t lessen the pain, but Sam tried to convince himself that it did.

“I’ve seen what this search did to you and I’m sorry I put you through that,” Steve said.

“Alright,” Sam replied and got up from the bed. “I guess I will be going home then,” he mumbled, not meeting Steve’s eyes, because goddammit did it hurt to be brushed off like this, and he threw some stuff into his bag.

“What are you…?” Steve asked and reached out for him. “Sam! We are both going home!” he almost yelled and Sam stopped.

“What do you mean, ‘we are both going home’? You haven’t found Barnes yet.”

“And I won’t if he doesn’t want to be found, and I won’t continue to do this to you. I love you, Sam, I wouldn’t leave you for him, even if we did find him, and apparently I didn’t make myself very clear. It’s time I did that now.”

Steve took a deep breath before he continued. “Bucky and I, we were over before he fell. He is my best friend, and I love him, but not like I love you. And it’s time I act like it. I am sorry I made you feel like he was more important to me, but he isn’t. If you want to go home, we will, and if you want me to stay away, I will do that too, but please. I never meant to do that to you and I am sorry.”

Sam was speechless for a few seconds before he reached out for Steve, who readily grasped his hand.

“Let’s go home together,” Steve said and Sam nodded.

“I would love that.”

**Author's Note:**

> This story also has a [post on Tumblr](http://bloody-bee-tea.tumblr.com/post/158826072626/number-9-i-dont-think-i-can-do-this-anymore)
> 
> You can always find me on my [tumblr](http://bloody-bee-tea.tumblr.com/)


End file.
